Just Desserts

How not to react during a job interview.

This post is a little out of the scope of the blog, but does explain why we haven’t been blogging as much as usual. Drumroll please, CLERKSHIP INTERVIEW SEASON!

I suck at interviews. I really do. I become really nervous and panic attacky and I can’t think straight.

Given that it’s been almost a year since I interviewed for my current law firm job, I thought back at how dismal my interview was (and out of some frigging miracle, I still got the job). All answers extracted here are (no joke) exactly what I said.

Mistake 1: I did not shake anyone’s hands before or after the interview. They must have thought I was some germaphobe or an alien who didn’t know the basic human social etiquette of shaking people’s hands.

Mistake 2:
Q: What kind of law are you interested in?
Me: I love development economics! (Proceeds to talk about development economics).

Mistake 3:
Q: Do you know how to use excel?
Me: Hell yeah, I’m a pro at that!

Mistake 4:
Q: What level maths did you do in high school?
Me: Yeah, four unit maths. Why, were you taking bets or something?

Mistake 5:
Q: Why do you want to work here?
Me: Youse seem like nice people, I wouldn’t mind working with youse. You said hi to me when I walked in and didn’t ignore me, so that’s good.

I don’t know why I was so sarcastic and such a frigging weirdo during that interview. I remember writing it off when I got home; I wasn’t articulate and didn’t even focus on what their practice area was.  

However, if the selection criteria was to hire someone who was a rambler, sarcastic, a little bit weird (but not in the dangerous, murderer way), had no relevant experience but could provide many hours of entertainment value, I clearly fulfilled the criteria.

I might as well have created a poster with an acrostic poem with my attributes.

Just to prove that I haven’t improved at all in interviews, I put on some frigging pantyhose, trotted around like a horse in my high heels and continued my “winning” streak today.

Things started well when I awkwardly ran into my current boss on the way to the interview (the buildings are opposite one another but the buildings are 67 and 12 storeys high with foodcourts and shops and people running everywhere; so what were the chances that we’d cross paths at exactly the same time?!) 

Then amongst other questions, one question I was asked was;

Questioner: What would you do if your partner gave you a task to do, due in an hour and you needed to check something with him and he couldn’t be reached?

Me: OH crap! I’m screwed then.

Yes, great answer! How profound Kim, how profound and insightful!

Does anyone have any other war stories from the clerkship interview season? (Or am I the only one who seizes up and sounds like a moron?)




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